You think you have a good website?

Let us do a deep crawl of Google, Yahoo, MSN, and all your backlinks and give you an acurate look at your overall ranking! Why are you spending 100's on software? We do it for free!

Enter your website address here.

http://www.

** WARNING -- These results may appear different from results other analysis tools provide. Our system uses a multi-wheeled dual quad hamster powered adapter to search the web for everything to do with your website.

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Warning Number TWO!! This site may not be suitable for the weak at heart, the 4 hour erection, those Collecting the Civil War Chess Set, the Single moms with several Babies Daddies, or the stick in there arse SEO-Jedi-Master-wannbes.

You have been warned.

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Who are we?

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Our Qualifications

Seo-Sucks has spent tens of thousands of nothing hiring an expert staff of writers, SEO experts, beer guzzling red necks, a few small dogs, and the occasional person who just felt they had something to say! If that isn't enough for you to waste your time here, we are also giving evey 400th visitor a free search engine. That's right, a SEARCH ENGINE. Actually we are having a special right now...... you can get your own seach engine even if your the 3rd visitor. Just go here and search for anything you want: http://www.google.com . Remember we are generous and we worked at least 20 minutes putting this site together, so you better take it seriously.

Our Grammar

Remember in th third grade when your teacher told you Grammar was important? We were out drinking that day, and missed the whole lecture. If you think spelling, punctuation, and run on sentances are a problem you should probably hit the X button (Visit our sponsors first, hell we don't get any SEO traffic to help pay the bills).

OUR BLOG

We know that Bloggin is the wave of the future, we went ahead and set one up and Lenny is learnin to use it. He is going to teach the customer service staff how to use it when he sobbers up. In the mean time you have to listen to our crap. Visit the Blog here: SEO-SUCKS BLOG

OUR Purpose:

Well we want to have a little fun. Is that O.K. with you? If not just bite off.

SEO-Sucks Expert Tips

We have hundreds of tips, tutorials, and magic-secret-super advice inside. Here is a taste of what we have done for others, and what our experts say:

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"Increasing PR is a constant battle between the FORCE and you. The Force being the search engine, and you of course being you, umm the Webmaster guy thingy. To increase your PR you need to generate Links. There are several tried and true methods of this procedure. To beg for a reciprocal link is always the best way!! --SEO-Sucks Cousin Bob

"Getting a top ten SERP is easy if you Know SEO, Like I know SEO and I know that I know that you know that I know SEO". - SEO I AM

"I always wanted to be a search engine expert. Ed and Eric finally let me. I only had to buy them three cases of beer, and sell thier wives. If you need help just come and ask me"

--SEO WANNABE

"Thanks to what I learned at Seo-sucks, I now know my site really does suck. While I thought I would be disapointed, I found that it really is a relief to know I am below average in something other than my sex life".

--SEO FAILURE

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